The Basics of Conflict Management
“It is the words and actions employed by the individual and their effectiveness when dealing with issues that determines if a person is a good, bad or excellent manager of conflict.”
All conflict starts with one side or the other being in disagreement.
If you and another party are in agreement there is no need for conflict as there are no conflicting viewpoints. Therefore if you are the person dealing with conflict it is important to remember this.
You may be managing conflict between others which you are not personally involved in. Usually it is easier to remain objective and help resolve the conflict positively and dispassionately as you are not emotionally invested in the outcome.
However, it is much more difficult to manage a conflict positively and objectively when we are the target of someone’s frustration, anger or aggression. We can easily escalate the situation by reacting emotionally and saying or doing something which antagonises the other person or group.
To calm or influence another person’s mood, emotions or reactions you first need to be able to control your own behaviour and reactions. This calls for a degree of self-awareness and a willingness on your part to want to manage any conflict positively.
Usually, when we are in a good place and feeling great about life we find it easier to let conflict directed at us slide by and not be taken to heart as those feel good endorphins have raised our tolerance levels to higher than normal and all we want to do in those moments is “spread the love, man”.
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